Ew.
...so Steve and I were on chat yesterday - as we do pretty much every day during the week. Yesterday he was regaling how he doesn't eat in bed 'coz crumbs get everywhere and he had a traumatic experience as a child when he couldn't sleep 'coz of all the crumbs so he had to sleep on the floor. Anyway, the conversation went a bit like this:
Ray: I'm so crumbing your bed next time.
Steve: If you do that, I'm gonna shit on your shoes.
Ray: I'll shit in your bike helmet. At least I don't have to put my head in my shoes.
Steve: I'll shit on your laptop keyboard.
Ray: I'll use all your beanies as toilet paper.
Steve: I'll vomit bile into a little bag and hide it in your closet and you won't know where that stench is coming from.
Ray: I'll cum on all your spoons.
Steve: That's gross. If you do that, I'll get live fish and put them in your bed (I have a fish-phobia for those who don't know).
Ray: Ok then...if you do that, I'll touch myself while watching you shower. Game over.
Steve: See you always go there. You're using a tactic that I can't use.
And i'm the winner!
Great weekend coming up. Tonight is work drinks followed by Ed's dance recital (He's playing baby jesus in a hip hop nativity dance troupe - No. Seriously). Tomorrow is shopping followed by dinner @ Jonny's. Sunday is yum cha with friends followed by Kris Kringle dinner @ Ed's. It's all happening!
Song of the day: "Love...Thy Will Be Done" - Martika
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